The Deception

Snow falls gently covering the ground one crystal at a time. We see a fresh blanket of snow and we are reminded of beauty, of innocence, of forgiveness, of uniqueness. But this is not all that is there. To see only this ignores a man shivering in its cold. a family left homeless from the roof cave-in. a motorist abandoned on her way home. In that blanket of snow exists frigidity, destruction, weight, loss. One truth does not negate the other. But choosing to see only one side is to see a deception. … [Read more...]

Buried

Mumford&Sons

(Last Thursday I went to the Mumford & Sons concert. It was amazing and I'm still working through some of what it brought up. This is a bit of my processing here.) These days, the pain that I experienced stays buried, like a poisonous treasure, waiting to eat through the protective covering to bring sickness and death. It doesn't hurt like it did, when it was fresh and oozed into every crack and crevice of my life. In those days, it was impossible to ignore, impossible to avoid. So I scrubbed and cleaned and purged. I waded through the disease to find health. I didn't cure it, but I contained it. I covered it. And when I did, I buried other things. Value. Worth. Use. And then. A man with a guitar steps on a stage. He sings a song whose words I … [Read more...]

Who I Am

Hello

Who am I? I know who people tell me to be. The smokin' hott wife. The Pinterest perfect mom. The articulate writer. The long-suffering friend. But much of the time, I am not. "Conform to this political ideology." "Believe this particularly theology." No matter what I choose, it's wrong, at least according to someone. So I ask again, Who am I? I am created in the image of the One who is I Am. So perhaps, instead of searching for who I should be, I need to remember who I Am. … [Read more...]

Poiema

In darkness...

Unregenerate. Sinner. Wretch. Spider. Hearts full of deceit that fall short of the glory of God. Churches expend energy declaring the worthlessness of the people in the pews. Concerned that darkness may go unnoticed, constant reminders that we are unlovable are given so none forget. Forgetting is hard. In angry words... In harsh thoughts... In ignored injustices... No, we don't forget. But we have forgotten that we are a masterpiece. A work of art crafted by the Giver of good gifts. We are divine poetry, fearfully and wonderfully made. Transformed. Righteous. Beloved. New. Poiema. … [Read more...]

Secret

whisper

The sound of a secret is a whisper. Even if it's good news. Even if no one else is around. A secret needs quiet to be heard. The space of a secret is small. Even if told in the open. Even if spoken in a crowd. A secret needs nearness to be shared. The heart of a secret is trust. Even if there is history. Even if there are only words on a screen. A secret needs confidence to be experienced.   This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. You are my friends when you do the things I command you. I’m no longer calling you servants because servants don’t understand what their master is thinking and planning. No, I’ve named you friends because I’ve let you in on … [Read more...]

Forgiving

forgive

I thought that forgiving you would be a one time event. We would embrace and I would softly whisper in your ear, "You're forgiven." Then we would shed a few tears and share a few laughs and things would be normal. We would be okay. But it's not been like that. Oh, we had that moment. But it didn't really change things. At least not the way that I hoped. I knew that your words had cut deep but I had no idea that the bleeding just. wouldn't. stop. And I heard opposing stories. Forgiveness isn't a feeling, it's an action! and If you still think about it, you haven't forgiven! and Forgiveness doesn't mean you open yourself to abuse! and How can you forgive and hold someone at arm's length! I twisted and turned to try to figure out if I'd actually … [Read more...]

Advent Prayer

Night Sky

  Your Advent: The splendor of heaven left behind, now surrounded by dirt and cow excrement. Shrouds of glory abandoned for strips of cloth wrapped around you by a new mother after she carefully wiped away vernix and after-birth. Cries of "peace on earth" echoed across the hills and in the ears of the lowliest; the only announcement of your arrival. Beauty for filth Majesty for squalor Grandeur for obscurity All that we might celebrate our own advent. … [Read more...]

Held

Absence present again. One, loss of the Divine. Another, loss to the Divine. Tears that stain hearts move to stain cheeks. God slips into human skin and they are held. Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.  ~Galatians 6:2, NIV … [Read more...]

The Loudest Quiet

Conversations that sound more of argument than discussion; Sobs that rack shoulders and soak shirts; Laughter that rings in ears long after it has left the throat; I rest in this loud quiet. … [Read more...]

Stretched

The web is stretched. Clinging to the railing, held fast by barely visible threads. There is beauty there in the intricate, delicate design, highlighted by the morning dew. Beauty, but not perfection. Ragged bits, torn apart by bugs providing sustenance; by sticks blown in by the wind; by careless people walking past. Beauty marred by daily life. Awaiting its creator to repair it; to make it whole.   … [Read more...]